so i apparently have a new pal in the spirit realm.

yup. mr. squirrel and i have become quite close the last few days. here's what the celtic connection has to say about my furry lil nut lovin friend. Squirrel: Squirrels symbolize gathering, foresight, energy, erratic behavior, storing, gossip, warning, change, discovery, truth, balance and harmony. They are messengers of the Gods and mischief-makers. They warn you to be careful of useless hoarding and teach you to take life lightly.  a lot of that makes sense. especially the erratic behavior on my part. i have been normal on the outside, but a bit of a roller coaster on the inside. i have been waking up in crummy moods then at about 2 in the afternoon i ether talk myself outta it, or i just plain feel better. i really think it's my anxiety. it is trying to manifest in anyway it can. i swear my brain is searching for reasons to feel guilty. it's quite silly. so i stop it. so far so good. :) so the reason why i'm feeling so close to the squirrels is because of 2 run ins  2 days in a row! yesterday i had the yelling in my ear escapade. and then later as i was going to work i was gathering towels from outside to bring into the rv. i looked up at my tree cause i heard a butterfly go by. ya! it was that close! i looked at it for a sec. ok, longer then a sec! ha! then i heard a rustling in the back of my yard. i looked up to see a lil squirrel on my fence! he stopped and looked at me then went into my fig tree. i laughed and said hi. then went over to my rv to see him following me! he walked across my garage and then leaps onto a telephone poll that was about 3 feet from me. it was crazy! he paused again and then wondered off to another tree. then today on a walk i had one running from tree to tree to tree following me. it was funny! then he jumped onto a cool tree that hangs over the sidewalk and he was literally above me! so i would be crazy to not think they are there for a reason! lol!!

so still lovin learning about the druids. the book is very interesting. i really like the lil differences. for instance. he says *be it so* instead of *so mote it be*. -i like the *be it so* saying better. :) i have been trying out some of the practices to see if i like it. and yes so far so good. i have done a small morning ritual for 2 days now, and i really enjoyed it. i have tweaked what he does and made it my own. i light 4 candles for the mighty kindreds. 2 on my alter for bran and brighid. then one in my living room -which is pretty much an alter anyway! ha!!- for the nature spirits. and then the last one in my kitchen for the ancestors. i also take a little cup of water and a little bit of bread and go to my 3 favorite trees in my yard. i poor water and give them a small piece of bread. (which is why i think mr. squirrel was there!) and i also do what i used to do with my a.m. yoga/ritual. and then a bit of meditation and a rune card pull. so it's what i've always done with a bit more. i have really enjoyed it. i also have done a short walk each morning. but i know that won't be an everyday event! lol!! however i will really try to walk everyday. just not every morning. i prefer night walks anyway. :) what i am loving the most about this is that i am honoring my ancestors daily. i was excited on the 26th cause i started to honor them for samhain. but now i can do it daily! that is really cool!!

now.. here's my problem.. what do i do when i have people stay over, or if i am on vacation? for instance. my mom will be staying with me this weekend cause there is a dog show near me. so i know that she will be up before me, how do i continue this practice with her here. and i may be going with her and my dad up north for a dog show. it will be a 2 day thing. how will i do it then? i guess the candles don't have to be lit. and the bread can wait. maybe if i just mentally do it on those occasions... don't know. oh! so you  know what sucks?!? with my mom coming, i am going to work on friday. long story, but now i am working friday and my mom will be coming on friday. so i can't do a big ol samhain celebration! :( i am happy and sad at the same time. i want my mom to be here. and it will be nice to have someone with me while i pass out candy... but i'm just bummed about the ritual. and no way, no how will she join me. not her deal. not at all. she is very understanding and not judgmental about it all.. well.. kinda.. but not bad and so i can't do it in front of her. oh well. time for plan b. a silent late ritual. i'm sure it will be just as nice. :D

ok. time to go to work! love you all! have a splendid day! ((((hugs))))~ alysia

yesterday i did what i set out to do. i searched for the best books i could find. i went to a local bookstore and looked for an isaac bonewits book-for he had been suggested to me a while back. funny how he is being referred to me now also... found one. then as i was about to go grab a seat i saw *the solitary druid* by robert lee ellison. i grabbed it also. took a seat and cracked open mr. bonewits' book. i began in the beginning. lol!! while reading over the intro i stumbled upon something rather funny. in his intro mr. bonewits quotes and acknowledges mr. ellison (the other author i grabbed for those of you who aren't keeping tabs. ha!). i kept reading mr. bonewits... but i kinda was loosing interest. so i opened up mr. ellison's. this one grabbed me. he reminded me of scott cunningham. very down to earth and practical. and the best part was that it had all the elements in the contents that i wanted to know about -what they believe. what a daily devotional really consists of. and even divination! so, i opted for mr. ellison's solitary book. what is cool about his book is he has a  section in the back that says if you want to no longer be solitary then check out these website. i think that is pretty sweet! so i've already read 46 pages! lol! i think i read about 30 in one sitting then the rest before bed. :) i am having total flashbacks to when i was studying wicca. so much is clicking. there is so many things that are very important to me that work with what mr. ellison says. what i love thus far is that he is very honest about the fact that no one truly knows what the druids of old did. there was no records from them that were written. apparently cesar and aristotle  were a few of the people who did take note of what the druids did. it is believed that even though the people of the time worshiped the same gods and goddess', they were not considered druid. the druids were the high priests. they were able to go from clan to clan and help whomever need it. i seems that the people did their own religious rites -such as fertility or appeasing house hold spirits. what most druids today practice is based on what the druids of old did. in the writing of aristotle -and many others- they described what they did, what they believed and how they lived. but it is difficult to say for sure that it was  this way or that. these people where usually christains and were known to make shit up. lol!!!

so there's that. but what i found to be most interesting was their love and their devotion to what they call *mighty kindreds*. these are ancestors (your own and the ones of the land. people who lived their before you), spirits of nature (fairies and sprites and brownies and the energies of trees. in this group they also include animals. which is very cool and very important to this witch!) and the divine. so far i am feeling *at home* as herbalpagan put it. ;) (love that btw!  :D) it is wonderful the love and reverence they have for all of the above! it is so funny to me because i have been, as of late, very interested in who my ancestors were. i also have been talking to and becoming very close with certain trees. and i can tell that this was the right time for me to read this because of my resent run in with the fairies. i used to not believe in them. totally do now! ha!! so it is great timing. i also find it funny that the brighid and bran are celebrated by the druid people. so, so far most of the 46 pages i've read have clicked big time! there are somethings that i may make my own if i should decide this is my path. you know the one reason why i hadn't gone for the druid books in the store were because of the virgin connie swail. lol!! anyone see dragnet the movie? ha!! my dad is always making jokes about that whenever i speak of rituals. *ugh* he will never understand and that's ok. :)

and lastly. this morning i decided to go for a quick walk. during which i would ponder druid ways... as i started i walked by a tree and heard what sounded like a dog squeaker. i was like wtf? and looked around. you see. i am totally deaf on my right ear and the tree was on my left. i heard the squeak in my good ear. loudly!!! so i  spun around and look all over. then i heard a kind of chattering. almost like a bird but not quite. so i looked up at the tree to see a squirrel. he had a little acorn in his mouth and he was yelling at me! ha!! that was the funniest thing i've ever seen!! that was great! i must've been right next to him in the beginning. that was really cute. :)

ah!! i just saw that my most favorite show *pushing daisies* is on the chopping block to be canceled!!! aahhhh!!! everyone please watch it! it is the best show ever!!! pppppllllllleeeeaaassssseeeeee!!!!!!!

happy monday guys!! (((hugs))))~ alysia

although i loathe titles with everything i've got.... i have decided to no longer consider myself  a wiccan. even though i am sad to see it go -only because this title was the way i found my true path- i know i must. i am about to embark on a religious quest of sorts. lol! before i can fully accept a path -that i am sure is already mine and mine alone- i need to fully understand all those that i will be rejecting. my reason for letting go of wicca -thus far- is because i have seen some things that don't jive with what i believe. i have always kinda felt that way. that's probably why i like to make my own rituals and celebrations for each holiday. i also have found quite a few inconsistencies in the definition of wicca. some say that it is primarily a goddess religion. some that they don't worship actual spiritual beings, but nature... for that is the embodiment of divinity. i have also heard that they pick and choose whatever god/goddess they want to use for whatever they are doing. in addition i have heard that they only view the god as the sun and the goddess as the moon. and it is up to you to interpret what they look like or even what their names are! i honestly get the feeling that some of these authors and high priest/esses have just come up with their own belief system and placed it under the umbrella that is wicca. i have never read anything by gerald gardener, but isn't he or even allister crowly (sp?) the ones who started it? or at least one of the firsts. i suppose it would be interesting to read up on what they have to say, maybe i will check it out. but i have always found it hard to swallow the fact that wicca is really a *newer* religion. i prefer my religion like my wine... old! ha!! soooo... here's what i know. my beliefs fall in the land of the celts. i love and respect the earth and all it's inhabitants.  i celebrate the turning of the wheel.. however that is something that i must delve into a bit further. i also celebrate and speak to the moon and the sun. :) i have a patron god and goddess whom i celebrate daily. i have allowed them to guide me in how to celebrate them. i have also been listening closely to them, this is why i feel i must study now. i have never liked doing a grandiose ritual. with all the swords and chalices. doesn't quite work for me. i get it. but i don't do it. lol!! so i am thinking of taking a lil trip to the bookstore today and doing a little bit of studying. i am interested in learning more about the druid path. and i would like to learn a lot more about the celts.  i am a little weary though. i feel like so many books out there are written by people who just write what they think. not what has been practiced for years and years. i guess i need to open up my witchy senses and allow myself to find the right book. :) so this saga is to be continued for now. :)

onto my family!! i had a blast at the pumpkin patch! the only downer part.. it was about 95 out! i was sooooo hot! we really didn't stay very long. but we checked out the pumpkins and then did the petting zoo (which my sis's a-hole hubby wouldn't allow my niece to go into. even though she's been in one before! ugh i hate that guy!) and while the lil ones went on the train my mom, dad, sis, aunt, uncle, and i went through the corn maze. it was cute and fun. :D the other sad thing was that we missed the pig races. that would've been so funny!! so here are some pix:
my niece in her cow costume that my sis made. she didn't wear it long cause of the extreme heat!




my friends little boy saying cheese for the camera.
  

and the lil pumpkin don jaun.



so there you have it. :) good times had by all. :D alright, time for me to get ready for the day. and time to learn a bit about my path. :) (((hugs)))~ alysia  

i have pumpkin bread in my oven right now. i'm not gonna lie ladies and gentlemen.. my house smells orgasmic! ha!! it smells so wonderful! pumpkin bread making is a lot of work, but i had help.....


ha!! and after all his hard work lil edgar went and relaxed in his favorite spot

yup, i'm crazy! ha! i couldn't resist though. lol!!! so wanna know something crappy?!? the pumpkin that he's sitting on is rotting! dammit! it only lasted a week! what's up with that?! i'm thinking of getting one of those fake ones instead. not sure if they are hollow though.. i guess i'll find out!

so i had to get up at 5:30 this morning! i went with my uncle to work and then picked up my dad's car. long story why, but i am tired now! it's about noon. and i am beat. mostly cause i couldn't fall asleep. that always happens when i need to get up early! it was kinda neat seeing the waining moon out though. lol!

so i got my hair done and i had a blast as always! my landlady rocks! :) so we did it a little bit shorter and did it really dark and added peek-a-boo high lights. it's cute! i will like it even more once i get to totally style it on my own. she used a flat iron so it was really straight! my hair really isn't that curly, but it has nice body and wave to it. i like that about it, sooo it will look better later. but here you all go:

and even though my pinkie wanted nothing to do with this. here's me rockin my new cut. ;P


no big plans for today. just gonna clean up and then maybe go to trader joes. oh and maybe see about getting another pumpkin. my alter is gonna look so sad without one! i leave you all with a pic of my honeysuckle bloom. :) have a great day!!!

i did the coolest thing yesterday! in the morning i decided to smug myself. i was feeling a bit tense. so i took my sage and began to smug around me. i suddenly had the urge to do my chakras. so i took the sage and made little circles around the spots. when i got to my heart i suddenly felt all my tension go away! it was cool! it felt really good almost like an itch was being scratched. i had no idea that all my tension was gathering there. but it was. and this description of what the heart chakra is for makes a whole lotta sense! *Relationships, Love, Acceptance, Self-Control, Compassion, Guilt, Forgiveness, Harmony, Peace, Renewal, Growth* all of those work for me and where i am in my life. and i could see that all of those are and were coming to a head. just some more crap to work on! ha!! i just keep reminding myself how boring life would be if i didn't have anything to work on. lol!!!

so i am gonna get my hair cut and colored today. :) haven't decided what i wanna do. i'm thinking something different. i'm getting sick of this cut already! lol!! i am going to go darker for sure though. i will take pix when i get it done. have i told you all how much i love my landlady??? she is also my hairstylist. she and i barter. i groom her dog and she grooms me. :D it is beautiful! i love it! i always am the last one to benefit from my money. well, physically anyway. i don't get my nails done, i don't get new cloths often. and if i didn't have my landlady, i'd rarely ever get my hair cut. i'd probably have my mom do it! ha! so it's nice to have a guilt free cut and color.

so after days and days of contemplation.. i have come up with one new tradition i shall do for samhain. i decided that i really wanna welcome loved ones who have passed. so i will be lighting my candles on my ancestors alter everyday for 5 days before samhain. so i've got until the 26th to figure out if i will say something or not. i may also leave out a bit of my dinner every night. i'm still working on poems and the general ritual for the night of. i think i will take the day off. it is a religious holiday after all. :) goddess i love being my own boss. ;P i think i will sit in front of my house with candy and my fire bowl going for the trick-or-treaters. i don't want the dogs to go crazy every time someone knocks! i will make it fun and wear my witch hat and read mr. poe. :) maybe i'll even put out chairs for my passed loved ones. :D we shall see.

oh! and one last thing. i have an odd connection to president lincoln too. not like poe.. but kinda. i adore him. if there is ever a bio on him on tv i watch it, and i have been known to look up info on him too. he and his wife mary were into the whole spiritualist thing. mr. lincoln had a dream before he died that he was gonna die. i have often wondered if i was some how connected to him also. i looked just like mary todd at my sisters wedding! lol! i had ringlets and all. i also was about 30lbs heavier! lol! so i recently learned that poe and lincoln were born in the same year. only months apart as a matter of fact. mr. poe was not alive durring mr. lincoln's presidency, however, mr. lincoln loved poe's writing! lincoln also aspired to be a dark writer. i don't know what it's all about.. but i now strongly feel that i was alive during that time period. would love to know who the heck i was! lol! here's a funny comic i found. i typed in poe and lincoln on yahoo. i guess they had a lot in common. :D